weather

The weather can effect mood in a way comical, like in a badly written movie with overly moody music. A couple meets after a long time, violins crecendo just as we zoom up for a close up of the kissing couple. A woman stands alone, minding her own business in her kitchen, slow dawnting music gets louder and louder, as fear creeps in and we all KNOW there is an axe murderer around the corner. A man sits at a desk looking out at a cloudy grey day, an hour still before 5. Suddenly the sun comes out, warming the green grass and pushing the clouds away. The man smiles, energy revived, and moves fast to try to leave work early. Cheesy maybe, but true.

This morning I awoke to a blizzard, or at least a lot of snow. I caffeinated myself and went out to shovel the long steep drive. The fluffy snow was just heavy enough to make me warm... sweating... breathing heavier... I enjoyed teh cool air. I saw a friend and neighbor who lives down the road driving an old pickup with a plough on the front of it. I waved, he waved, then backup up and ploughed a good portion of the drive. We visited for a couple minutes, be drove away, I continued shoveling what snow was left, and around the mailbox. Another neighbor came out, beginning to shovel his drive. We waved. A small grey car began to drive toward us, with mountains of snow on top of it. No other cars had driven the snow, unwilling to tackle the 4 inches that had fallen since the city's plough had come by. The little grey car stopped, waved at my neighbor. He leaned down to the passenger window, then walked away, coming back to the car with a broom, and pushed the snow off the back window. I eventually finished, then went to get the big dog to play in the snow in the backyard.

Quaint... hun...

But then as I sit at the table, looking out the window, eating cereal, it starts to rain heavy drops of rain from the grey thick clouds above. I find I have to fight a deep sadness that comes as fast as the water from the sky. Maybe it feels like a rush of the seasons. Maybe its that it makes it harder to stop, notice and enjoy the snow. Maybe its the unexpected, raining down on my happy parade. But it effect my mood, my day, my energy and my body as I trade my parka for a raincoat.

We are so effected by our environments, our places, and yet most of the time ignore them. But their effects on us cannot be ignored. Our bodies bring us back into our places. If it's freezing outside, our bodies need parkas, or we'll die (at least eventually). This place, this day, this weather, demands that I be present, enjoy the snow, sit in the sadness that comes with the rain, and hopefully enjoy the clean air after the rain finally ends. For it can't rain forever, even if it feels like it will right now.