the idealist

Beneath my deep pessimism I am an idealist. I'll admit it. I've heard people disparage this word, this concept, idealist. I've heard people infer that someone who is an idealist is childish, inexperienced, somehow not grounded in reality. I think people sometimes think these people who are idealists, especially politically, have not been tested, have not been tried, and have in some ways surely had an easy life. I don't agree. To be an idealist is to dream of a better way. To be an idealist is to hold humanity up to a higher standard. To be an idealist is to know in your heart that better is possible. And in that way I think it's possible to get a broken heart when the world appears to have let you down. But to be an idealist you have to be tenavious, stubborn, persistent. It's easier to let the dream die out. It's easier to say, well - that's not possible so I'm not going to try, I'll just work within reality. But just because something is easier doesn't mean it's the adult way of doing things. In fact, I think it should be the opposite.



I've felt tempted to let reality break me, to avoid it breaking my heart. I've felt tempted to let reality lower my expectations. But I don't think I can. I've said before that having a child makes it impossible for me to consider giving up. That's maybe the most amazing, overwhelming and inspiring change my son has brought me. I won't let myself rollover and give up until I know with certainty I've done my best to provide for him, provide food, shelter, love, safety, reassurance, creativity, awareness, grounding and possibility. So I will fight my own pessimism to remain open to the possibility of change. I won't let one lost election, one absent paycheck, one prejudicial decision, or one leaking roof lower my expectations for the world and the life that is possible for him to have.

"Our moral instincts are immune to the explicitly articulated commandments handed down by religions and governments. Sometimes our moral intuitions will converge with those that culture spells out, and sometimes they will diverge. An understanding of our moral instincts is long overdue." Marc D. Hauser